Here is a picture of our ancestors, the fish.

My branch of the family participated in Evolution, developed stumpy fins and crawled onto the land. Was that a wise move? Right away we wound up in the trees, go figure!
Then we invented walking, a controlled forward-falling, a silly way of propelling ourselves—and it hurts the feet! That's why we now have automobiles.

I suggest, we line up all the automobiles and drive them back into the ocean, where they belong…

This is how we used to paint in the Sung Dynasty, my buddy Mi Fei and I—in the Blue-Green Style.
How many turquoise ornaments and lapislazuli hair-pins I have pulverized to get those colors!
For fun we would copy each other's paintings and sign them with our own names. Who could know—in the eleventh century—that Mi would hit the big time and become world famous?

Those paintings bearing his name in the Palace Museum, Taipe, and in the Freer Gallery, Boston are really mine!
And I want them back.